Skyline & Ocean’s Thirteen

Yesterday Skyline came from Netflix and unfortunately I watched it. My mom makes fun of my dad for watching really terrible, pointless movies. Sometimes I like the movies she hates, but as far as Skyline goes, we totally agree: this movie sucks. I really liked the idea about the blue tractor beam’s effects on people. Weird bruises would start to appear all over their bodies, and if they got angry their eyes would glaze over and the veins and bruises would appear on their face again. Super creepy. Jarrod, the only guy to survive long enough to see the symptoms said that it made him feel powerful. I was wondering if this was going to be an alien-zombie movie, sort of like vampire-zombie movies like I Am Legend.

This would all be great, except there is NO PLOT.  At the beginning they take forever to establish that Jarrod’s friend Terry is cheating on his wife Candice with his assistant Denise. This could’ve been interesting; would Terry have to choose between them? Would Candice try to save Terry or just let him die? Would Candice and Denise have to save each other? But maybe 1/4 of the way through the movie, an alien squished Denise and snatched Terry. So there was no point in having the  back story because 2 of the 3 people in the love triangle are already dead.

It doesn’t help that two of the characters were super annoying. In the picture Candice looks likeable, but she’s stuck-up and obnoxious in the beginning of the movie and barely has a personality at all in the second half. Oliver was even worse. At first I thought, hey, he’s taking charge and seems fairly intelligent. But he just turned out to be really stupid, stubborn, and annoying– not a good combination when you’re trying to survive an alien invasion. At one intense moment he was trying to kill himself in a “manly way” by lighting a cigarette over an open gas burner and I started laughing when the lighter wouldn’t work. I don’t think that’s the reaction they wanted. I’d been hoping that Skyline’s ending wouldn’t be like Cloverfield’s, where everybody died at the end. I couldn’t believe that Skyline was even more depressing and ambiguous.

On a happier note, I caught the end of Ocean’s Thirteen so I could watch something happy after all the depressingness of Skyline. I love the final scene in Ocean’s Thirteen. On top of all the harassment the Ocean gang had put the V.U.P. through to make sure he gives Bank’s hotel a bad review, he’s now stuck at the airport, sick and miserable. To make up for it, Rusty and the others had set up one of the slot machines to give him 11 million dollars. I’m not usually a big Brad Pitt fan, but the shot of him smiling as he walks away is almost enough to make me a believer.

Edit: I forgot to tell you about a funny review of Skyline I read. Here it is!

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